Faithfoolishness

Amen.

But there was a time when I swear I was on the fast track to being the first person ever to have “I wish I’d spent more time at work” carved on my headstone.

Back in the late 1990’s, I was a general assignment reporter for The Daily Gazette, in Schenectady, NY. My work week went from Tuesday to Saturday. I especially loved my Saturday work, because that was when I did most of my human interest stories.  When I started out at the paper, I rotated on the Saturday shift — alternately covering mornings, afternoons and nights. Due to scheduling and personality issues, I was eventually re-assigned as the permanent Saturday night reporter. I loved the shift, although I sometimes missed some of the daytime events I covered.

I never once gave any consideration to the fact that it was Saturday night, I was single and I was at work. I realize I’m not the first person to live this kind of life nor will I be the last, but I can’t help but wonder how many young, single people would voluntarily put themselves in this position. Not many, I’d guess….

As you see, I struggle with setting boundaries. Back then, work was my life, pure and simple. I was so dedicated to the paper that, if I got a lead on a Saturday that wasn’t in my coverage area, I’d leave it for the reporter whose coverage area it was in. I missed out on some kick-a** front page stories that way and I’m confident that if the same situation were reversed, my colleagues would gladly have stabbed me in the back and RUN with the leads. I just didn’t know how to “play the game.”

Now I might sound bitter, but I’m not. Am I disappointed that I was so naive? Yeah, probably. Do I wonder what might have happened if I’d been less of a team player?  Sometimes. I loved being a reporter and, honestly, every now and again, I get the urge to go back to it. But I never will — at least not in the way in which I was a reporter back then. Ultimately, for all my dedication and faithfulness, I got fired when a source lied about me to my boss.

The irony is that after I was fired, I reinvented myself. I lost a significant amount of weight, went back to school, moved to the part of the country I’d long wanted to live in and, eventually, met the guy who is now my husband.

Some synonyms for the word “Dedication” are commitment and faithfulness. These days, I cringe when I consider that I was committed to a job to the detriment of my own well-being. I should have been committed, if you know what I mean! A number of years later, I found myself having to decide between a job and my personal life. Can I tell you? IT WAS A NO-BRAINER.

Have you, my BlogFEST 2012 readers, ever noticed that the word “faithful” kinda has the word “fool” in it? ‘Nuff said.

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3 Comments

  1. I’ve been in your shoes…different job(s), but same commitment and faithfulness. And where did it get me…years lost and no real success. It wasn’t until recently that I finally figured it out. I think you and I are on the same page with this thing!

    Reply
  2. Thanks for participating in my prompt. I still don’t know how to “play the game” and I think we are much better people for it. Love your take on the prompt.

    Reply
  3. I can relate– I’ve been overly dedicated to a job that paid no loyalty back toward me in the end. Hindsight is always 20/20. Great post ;D

    Reply

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